what is love?

On her blog, my friend Shannon posted an entry about love and asked us to respond to what we think love is. I thought this was a great topic and decided to copy her. Thanks Shannon!

In the Bible it says that charity or love "suffereth long and is kind, envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, ...is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil..." (1 Corinthians 13) It also says "And though I have the gift of prophecy and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing." I think these are powerful statements.

We can love things and people. Of course, it is our relationships with people that bring us real happiness and help us to grow. Love can be felt for our spouse, children, parents, siblings, friends, extended family, neighbors and even strangers, but the intensity of those feelings is different.

I think in its truest form, love is caring more about someone else's welfare than about your own. It is focussing on the good in someone, rather than the bad. Love means we try to withhold judgment and help and serve and bless and lift up, rather than criticize and tear down. It is remembering that everyone we meet... friend, family member, neighbor, stranger is a child of God and has divinity within them.

I shared this in Shannon's post, but I love this quote from C.S. Lewis from his essay "The Weight of Glory". ... I"m including just a little more of the quote here.

"It may be possible for each to think too much of his own potential glory hereafter; it is hardly possible for him to think too often or too deeply about that of his neighbor. The load, or weight, or burden of my neighbor's glory should be laid daily on my back.... It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror or corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one of other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities ... that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. ... It is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub and exploit."

Wow! That always makes me reflect on how I treat others. For Christians, we have been taught to love our neighbors as ourselves... to try and act as Jesus would. I have a long way to go, but I'm trying to show more love and to be less selfish. I think that, for me, prayer and service are two keys. I learn to love those that I pray for and help/serve.

In another book I read, Expecting Adam, by Martha Beck, she tells of a time when she was jogging and saw what she thought was a piece of quartz. She leaned over to pick it up and realized it was just styrofoam, garbage. This caused her to reflect. The object hadn't changed from first glance until she picked it up; just her perception of the object changed. She started to think that this was true of people too. She decided to try to see the beauty and good in others. She was soon in tears because as she looked at people she saw such beauty. She writes "If we saw people as they really are, the beauty would overwhelm us." Few, if any of us, spend our time really seeing the good in others, but at times, I have had brief glimpses of the goodness of others and it is overwhelming and miraculous.

So, any thoughts? What do you love? What is love, to you?

next year

Well, I finally made a decision regarding next school year. I have been trying to decide whether to work full time or part time next year. I really wanted to work part time but due to several circumstances, we decided that I need to work full time next year. I felt really sad about it for the first few days, but think I've (mostly) come to terms with it now.

There were a few reasons for me to work full time, but I was still trying to figure out a way to make part time work. Then about a week and a half ago, my principal told me that if I go half time I would have to move to first grade and teach in first grade. (There is a great teacher in first grade that needs a job share; she does reading recovery half of the day which is an intensive one-on-one reading intervention). I wouldn't mind working with that teacher, but I would have to work afternoons and I don't want to teach first grade. I've taught third, fifth and sixth (for one year). First grade is not my area of comfort or expertise. Plus, I've worked really hard to get myself organized and established in third grade and starting over in a new grade sounds awful... especially since I'll be out for the first month and a half of the school year on maternity leave. If I worked afternoons, I think I'd spend my whole morning getting kids from place to place (Michelle will be in kindergarten, Ella in preschool...) and getting myself ready for work. It wouldn't be quality time with my kids. Plus, I wanted to work mornings because Michelle's school gets out earlier than mine, so then I could pick her up. Plus, the following year I would need to go back to full time and I would be at the mercy of my (new... we get a new principal next year) principal as to what grade I would teach. So I would probably end up teaching a different grade the following year too. It just sounds like a nightmare. In many ways, teaching third grade all day will be easier than teaching first for half a day. Finally, I love my third grade team. We work so well together. We are a great team and really help each other. I am a better teacher because of them and vice versa. Liz is already leaving, but Brenda and I don't want to be split up. We are good friends and we work really well together. And it shows. Despite some difficult years, we have done well at helping kids succeed academically... our test scores have been good, our reading scores have been good, and we really work as a team.

So the decision is made. I think it will be hard to work full time with a new baby. I was able to go part time after having Michelle and after having Ella. It is going to be a busy year with Michelle starting kindergarten. But we will make it work. I love this baby already, and wish I would be home more with her. But I feel that I'm making the right decision, and as my sister said when I talked to her tonight, the Lord helps you to work things out when you're doing the right things and trying the best you can. I just want to add how grateful I am for Janene. My girls love her and she takes such good care of them. I am grateful that she is willing to watch my baby for me next year. She is the best! We owe her so much. I can't even begin to express how grateful I am to her!! :)

how time flies

My girls are growing too fast!! This is Michelle when she was not quite three (taken in January 2006) and Ella when she was not quite a year old. They were so cute and sweet (and still are).
Ella has such big brown eyes and has been so alert and curious from the time she was born.
I love seeing pictures of my girls in hats. I think they look so cute. Look at Ella's cute grin.

my girls favorite books right now

I should be going to bed, but I had two stressful days in a row, and so I exercised, read and now I'm blogging to relieve stress.

So here are my girls' favorite books right now.

Silly Sally by Audrey Wood (they both have this one memorized)
any and all books about My Little Pony
A Bad Case of Stripes by David Shannon
Cha Cha Chimps by Julia Durango
Dinosaurumpus by Tony Mitton

What are your kids 3-5 favorite books? I literally have hundreds (perhaps thousands) of kids' picture books, but I'm still always looking for more. (Although I've stopped buying most of them and just get them from the library. I drive Alfredo a little bit crazy because I have books all over the house.)

tagged

Brandi (Michelle's amazing preschool teacher tagged me. So here I go.

Here are the rules:
A. Each player lists 6 facts/habits about themselves
B.At the end of the post, the player then tags 6 people then post their name; then goes to their blogs, leaves them a comment letting them know they have been tagged and invites them to read your blog.

6 things about me:
1. I read constantly. I finish, on average, one or two books a week. I used to read mostly children's/young adult chapter books. Now I read a lot of adult fiction as well as some biographies and other stuff mixed in. (Plus, a ton of children's picture books between reading to my third grade students and Michelle and Ella). I love mysteries/suspense. I also like novels set in other countries. But really, I read a wide range of stuff. I get up a half hour early every morning to read, I listen to books on CD while I drive to/from work, I read in snatches here and there each night. Often I'll have 2 or more books going at the same time.

2. I went to BYU and was in Hinckley Hall my freshman year. Then next year, six of us moved into an apartment together. We've stayed good friends. We have a myfamily website where eight of us from Hinckley Hall (+1 adopted Hinckley Hall girl... she actually joined our group the next year in an apartment and never lived in Hinckley, but she's one of us) still chat/post on a regular basis.

3. My husband is from Costa Rica. His immediate family (mom, 2 brothers and 2 sisters) all still live there. (His dad died when he was 11.) Alfredo and I have been married for almost 7 years, and I have never met his immediate family. Every summer we plan to go, but every summer something has come up (babies born, Ella's heart problem, etc.)... Maybe next year???

4. When I moved to Utah (from Arizona) to go to college, I had never seen snow fall (now I"ve seen too much!!!!) and I had only been to Arizona, Utah, and California. I took a trip after my freshman year that doubled the number of states I'd traveled to: Idaho, Montana, and Wyoming. Since I started college, I've been to about 10 additional states, 9 countries in Europe and to Korea. I wish I could travel even more, although I'm quite content to live here in the US... right here in Utah.

5. I come from a family of 3 girls, and now I'm raising a family with (soon to be) three girls. I am the oldest in my family. My sister Rebecca (2 years younger) has a son Evan (born 4 months before Michelle), a daughter Sarah (born 2 months after Ella) and a daughter due two months before my baby. So soon we will each have 3 kids, and they are four months or less apart.

6. Once when I was little, my sister and I decided we wanted candy. I believe it was the middle of summer. So we put on some costumes and went trick or treating to our neighbor's houses. Some neighbors didn't have any candy to give us (after all it was nowhere near Halloween) but a few did and we got enough to satisfy our sweet tooth. I think my mom was mortified when she found out.

There... a few things about me.

I tag.... Aly, April, Carin, Monica, Jill, and hmmm... I'll have to think of a sixth person

young women/church/reflections on faith

I serve in the young women presidency in my ward. One of our young women received her Young Womanhood Recognition award today. (It's comparable in scope to a boy receiving the Eagle Scout award.) This young woman, Bethanie, had a program tonight. She asked me to speak as well as the other young women leaders. She also had three friends perform musical numbers. Two girls, Lindley and Kayla, sang "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing" (and Lindley played the piano too). Another friend played a piano solo of "A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief".

The words to "Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing" really struck me. It's a beautiful song, but I was especially touched by the last verse.

O to grace how great a debtor
daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness, like a fetter,
bind my wandering heart to thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
prone to leave the God I love;
here's my heart, O take and seal it,
seal it for thy courts above.

It just seemed so true. Most of us, myself included, are prone to wander, to not be as close to our Lord and God as we should be. I don't mean to wander. I have always had a faith and belief in my Savior and in the church. I have always tried to live the gospel. Yet, I know that I can do better. And while I am sometimes prone "to wander" or at least to not make time for important things, such as scripture study, I do want the Lord to take my heart and seal it for his courts above.

Watching Bethanie, as well as the other wonderful, talented and deeply spiritual young women in my ward, I see what I want Michelle and Ella to be like. These girls are so amazing. They know who they are... they know that they are daughters of God. They have worked hard to develop their talents. They love and serve one another as well as others. They know that God lives and loves them and that Jesus is their Savior. Quite often, on Sundays, as we stand to say the Young Women Theme, I get tears in my eyes. There is something so powerful about these young women saying, "We are daughters of our Heavenly Father who loves us, and we love him. We will stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things and in all places..." Truly, they do strive to stand as witnesses of God each and every day. And they do know that they are children of God. Debbie Paur read "The Touch of the Master's Hand" during the program. That story always makes me cry. All of us have the potential to be great... All of us are of worth. It's hard for me to always remember that... about myself and about others. I am so grateful for the young women. They are not perfect, but they are so good. It gives me a lot of peace about the future. There is much in this world that is ugly and awful and even frightening. But there are so many youth that are strong and capable and that will make great leaders. When I look at them, I feel optimism about the future. I am so glad that I get to work with them. They teach me a lot more than I teach them, I'm sure. But while being in young women's requires quite a bit of time, it is a blessing in my life. And I hope/think it is a blessing in my girls' lives. I often take them to activities and my girls get to see these amazing girls and have become close to many of them. I hope that they will grow to have such strong testimonies and such faith.

haircut

I have thought on and off about cutting my hair for 2 or 3 months now. Thursday I decided I was sick of it and went to get it cut. I tend to do this from time to time, so it's not that unusual. About 3/4 of the time I love my new cut and the rest of the time, not so much. I'm not sure about this one yet.

Here are two pics of it on Thursday when the stylist did it.

(That means it will probably never look quite like this again. ... I'm not

that great at doing hair. Plus my hair has all this weird wave that makes it

quite unpredictable.)

Here's a pic of my hair today... and the rest of me, including my tummy. I'm 24 weeks along now. It's funny because in the past week I've had lots of people make comments about my expanding belly. It seems like one day someone will say, "Wow, you're getting big already." and the very next day someone will say I look great and I'm still so small. I know some of it does depend on what I wear, and a lot depends on my posture. But it's funny that people feel so free to express their opinions about everything when you're pregnant. Not that I mind. Just makes me laugh. As for me, I feel pretty good. I feel my little one moving a lot now. I've only gained about 5 pounds so far, which isn't much. But I think I'll gain steadily the rest of my pregnancy and still gain about 25 by the time I"m done. At least that's how it went with Ella (although I'd gained a little more by this point.) With Michelle, I started gaining on probaby day one and gained steadily the whole time, adding 40 pounds by the time I was through. But with Michelle, I was young and teeny and I was hungry all the time from the day I found out I was pregnant.

The girls are so cute. They tell everyone about the baby now. (A couple weeks ago, they were playing on the equipment at Artic Circle and they told the lady that was cleaning up the play area. :)) They love to kiss my tummy and talk to the baby. It's very sweet.