Matching

Gabby is very into matching right now. And she has her own unique ideas about what matches. Essentially, she thinks that things only match if they are the same color. For instance, she doesn't agree that jeans match with almost everything. She thinks they only match with things that have blue in them. Same with khaki pants...they can only be worn if the shirt has some brown/khaki in it. For the most part, I indulge her in finding "matching" clothes (and feel thankful that since she is only 3...almost 4, she has lots of outfits that came as sets.) But there are mornings when it feels frustrating to have her reject 3 or 4 outfits because they don't match or to have her insist on choosing her own outfit but then taking much longer to do it than I have time for in my busy morning rush. It's a good thing I adore that sweet but spunky kid!

Gabby is also very into rhyming right now. On an almost daily basis, she will announce to us that things rhyme. On Memorial Day, Brenda and Aelora came over and Alfredo barbecued. Brenda brought their dog, Daisy. Gabby announced, "Daisy and Maisy rhyme together." Those are the words she always uses. "Cat and hat rhyme together." I love to hear her voice listing words that she notices rhyme with each other. Most of the time her rhymes are actual words, but on occasion she will make up a word to have a rhyme. Three/four is such a great age! There is probably nothing I love in this world as much as hearing her laugh or seeing her smile.

I am so grateful for her and for her sweet bigger sisters.

Tonight she grabbed the umbrella and asked me for a blanket and a piece of toast. Pretty soon, I noticed she had set up the umbrella and was having a picnic on the living room floor with her baby doll. So stinking cute. She is so good at entertaining herself...she plays well with her sisters most of the time, but she is also content to go into her room and play with her own toys for long stretches of time. What a blessing it is to be her mom!

Michelle on the Run (Guest Post by Michelle)

Before the race photos:

Michelle with her running partner, Amber.

The Jackson running team! Go Cougars! (And I, Jenny, can especially cheer that, since I am a BYU grad and a loyal Cougar fan. :))

I just ran 3.1 miles last Saturday. It was hard but I kept going. We went around Sugarhouse Park two times and came to the finish line. My leaders were Cindy F., Cindy H. and Silvia. I did the race in 45 minutes with my partner Amber, and we almost ran the whole thing. I liked having two different spots where my family said go Michelle! I felt happy when I finished.

From Girls on the Run, I learned about peer pressure and keeping your body healthy. To do that, you need to stretch and play a lot of games to keep your health up. They talked about nutrition and eating healthy foods like bananas, any kind of fruit or vegetable and only sometimes eat bad foods. I learned to be kind to everybody else. I learned to always drink a lot of water so you don't get dehydrated. To keep your body healthy you need to stretch and do the things that I wrote.

I saw my friend Iree again. She used to go to Jackson, but now she goes to Bonneville.

During and after the race photos:

*Note from Jenny: Michelle did a great job! She is a good runner and has said she'd like to do another 5K. The Girls on the Run is a great program, and I hope she'll be able to do it again. There were a lot of girls there from a number of schools around Salt Lake. There was a band playing music, there was face painting and booths with food and snacks. The coaches gave the girls Cougar headbands, bells for their shoes and painted their faces. I also had a nice visit with Ella's teacher, Janna. Afterward, we took the girls to lunch at Arby's and then went to see the movie The Secret World of Arriety.

Ella and her friend Zoe with their faces painted:

Michelle with her sisters:

Our friend Annette was a running partner for Rose Park. My vice principal was also a running partner. Such fun!

Nifty Nine

It is hard for me to believe that Michelle is nine. But her ninth birthday was nearly 2 weeks ago. She is growing so quickly and turning into such a beautiful girl, inside and out. She is very good about helping me clean and is generally kind to her sisters. She is getting better and better at playing the piano and violin.

On her actual birthday, she wanted to go to Carls Jr. for dinner. After dinner at Carls Jr., we got ice cream at Cold Stone Creamery. I didn't bring my camera, so there are no pictures.

For her primary spotlight on her birthday, here were her answers:

Favorite color: pink and purple
Favorite food: Panda Express
Favorite dessert: ice cream cake
Favorite book: Diary of a Wimpy Kid
Favorite scripture story: David and Goliath
Favorite person: her sisters (I love that both Michelle and Ella said their favorite person was their sisters! Watching their relationship develop is one of my favorite parts of being a parent. Not that there isn't bickering at times, but they are usually so sweet with one another.)
Favorite thing to do in the winter: go sledding
Favorite thing to do in the summer: go swimming
What I like best about myself: I am very kind. I just ran 3.1 miles.
What my parents like best about me: She works hard, she is helpful, and she has many talents.
What I want to be when I grow up: an artist or doctor
What I like best about Primary: I get to say talks.

*I just want to record a cute thing about Michelle. When she was at violin lessons a couple of weeks ago, one of the other students had been hurt falling down stairs so the violin teacher had her make a card. As she finished the card, she said that she used to want to be a teacher or a doctor. Or maybe a performer (like a singer or musician). But, she said, "I didn't know I could draw so good. Maybe I'll be an artist." I love that she has so many aspirations and that she and Ella regularly talk about college. Just yesterday they kind of lectured a friend (who is only in kindergarten) that she must go to college when she gets bigger. The friend seemed uncertain whether she needed to, since she is planning to be a singer. They assured her that she needed to go to college to be a singer or to get any kind of good job. Love it! :) Education is not the most important thing in life, but in my opinion it is a very high priority...after all, your character and your knowledge are all you take with you when you leave this life.

Happy birthday to my beautiful, nifty nine year old.

Photos of the girls

Mostly these are just shots of the girls over the last few weeks.

But a few of them are the girls showing off a gift from Alfredo's aunt. She gave them each a headband with fake hair and they loved wearing it the rest of the day. They've also put them on many times since.

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The last photo is kind of random, but when we were eating steaks a few weeks ago, the girls suddenly got pretty excited. Both Michelle and Ella have learned about the continents and they were thrilled that one of the steaks looked very much like South America. They insisted that I grab my camera and take a photo. Silly, maybe, but I love that they are remembering what they learn and applying it to new situations. I love their enthusiasm...and that when something fun/exciting/unique/memorable happens, they are often the ones to encourage us to "grab the camera".

Inspiration

I am trying to be more aware of the hand of the Lord in my life, so I decided I better record this prompting right now. I was hanging up clean laundry, thinking about how stressed I am feeling right now with the end of school approaching, so many things to do and testing, testing, testing. I try hard to find ways to lower my stressm(exercise, read, prioritize) and try hard not to let my stress affect my interactions with my children...but reality is that it does moe often than I would like.

Suddenly I remembered asking my friend Cyndie how to teach children gratitude and the thought came so strongly that I need to model it in my thoughts and actions. And, in particular, that I need my children to hear on a regular basis why I am grateful for them. This will help them learn gratitude, but it will also increase the love and peace in our home and will help them see that being their mother brings me great joy. Gratitude's importance in my life is something I know and yet find that I have to be reminded of frequently.

Baile

On Friday, April 27, the girls' Ballet Folklorico performed at their school. They also held a silent auction to earn money. Ella and Michelle were excited to perform. Alfredo, Gabby and I were there, as well as Suzy and Dennis. My friend Brenda and her daughter Aelora also came to see the girls dance. They did a great job.

Michelle danced to "El Colas".

Ella danced to "La Iguana".

They also had dancers come from the Westside Dance Company and Ballet Folklorico Citlali.

Then Michelle and Ella danced again to La Bamba. It was a nice program.

Spectacular Seven

Ella is now seven! Her birthday was two weeks ago. We will be having a combined birthday party for her and Michelle in 2 weeks (since the end of April/beginning of May has been crazy busy and we've had events every Saturday since the 21st of April). But we did have a small family celebration on her actual birthday, complete with ice cream cake and singing.

Of course, her dad had to follow the tradition of shoving her face into the cake as she tried to take a bite.

Aunt Suzy was here with her boyfriend Dennis, which made it extra special for Ella.

The primary does a birthday spotlight for each child. They have the parents fill out a questionnaire. Here are Ella's answers:
Favorite color: pink
Favorite food: chicken nuggets (but she eats a wide variety of foods and isn't very picky now)
Favorite dessert: cake
Favorite book: Biscuit
Favorite scripture story: David and Goliath
Favorite person: her sisters (how sweet is that!)
Favorite thing to do in winter: go sledding (This struck me as funny because I've taken them sledding once and she
hated it because it was to cold. Probably a more honest answer is watch a movie or read a book.)
Favorite thing to do in the summer: go swimming
What I like best about myself: I'm a good reader.
What my parents like best about me: She is very kind to others and aware of their feelings.
What I want to be when I grow up: A veterinarian
What I like best about Primary: We get to do sharing time.

Gabby's art

Gabby loves to paint. She really loves to paint. I probably don't get the paints out as often as I should...although I do get them out at least 2-3 times per month and more in the summer. Most of the time her art is very abstract...it doesn't usually resemble anything at all...and I'm not really sure she is trying to make it look like anything specific. She does love to paint for specific people...making a painting for her dad or for me or for one of her sisters.

A week ago on Saturday, she painted and I watched for a minute then left the room to get some housework done. When I came back awhile later, she had finished painting and had created a painting for her dad that somehow really touched me. She'd put her handprints all over the paper. I'm not sure if it was because of the colors, the fact that it was her handprints, or something else, but I find this painting so beautiful.

Contentment...

I am listening to a book on CD right now. Well, let me back up a bit. My kids and I have a fairly long drive to their school each day. And we usually listen to a kids' book on CD as we drive. Not always, but most of the time. Then I have a 7-8 minute drive from their school to my school and then back again in the afternoon. Most normal people would probably listen to music during that time...but I prefer to be listening to something...usually a book of my own. But I am really trying to invite the spirit into my life more and so lately any time I am in the car alone, I listen to an LDS CD...I've listened to 3 by Sheri Dew so far and now I am listening to a book on CD called Contentment: Inspiring Insights for LDS women by Maria Covey Cole. I find things I have heard from Sister Dew and Sister Cole rattling through my head throughout the day. It has been such a good thing for me. It really has brought an added measure of peace, gratitude as well as some needed lessons. And even though, so far at least, I've just walked into Hunter Library, looked at what they had on the shelf and grabbed something, so much of it has been exactly what I needed to hear. I know I mentioned this briefly, but on my drive to and from Provo to say goodbye to my grandpa...literally minutes before he died... I was listening to a talk by Sheri Dew called "The Savior Heals Without A Scar" and it talked for a bit about death. How inspired is that! And there have been so many other times where other things she has said have popped in my head and have helped me.

Anyway, back to Sister Cole and contentment. She talks about how difficult it can be to be a mother...and how we don't always recognize how important our callings as mothers are and how much of a difference we are making...and how we can find peace, contentment and joy as we mother. She has talked about how amazing Latter-day Saint women are...(something Sheri Dew also talked about) and how some view the church as this organization that limits or oppresses women but how in actuality it gives women chances to lead, serve, speak, create and develop a variety of talents that many other women do not have the opportunity to develop. (It made me think about ‎how, often at work, when teachers want to present something to the administration that we are uncertain they will accept, they have asked me to present the case...and also, several times how my principal has asked me to present something to the teachers. One teacher said a few months ago that I often say the things she is thinking or wanting to say, but I say it in a way that others can understand and that doesn't offend. What a nice compliment...and as I was listening, I realized that at least some of my ability to do that has come from the opportunities I have had to teach, to speak, etc. at church.)

Sister Cole shared this quote that I really loved:
"Life is not about finding yourself. It is about creating yourself."
--George Bernard Shaw

But perhaps the part that has really helped so much is the section she had about comparing ourselves to others. This is, obviously, a lesson that I need to hear and that I am not learning very quickly (as I know I have posted about it before...and it was also something that stuck out to me at conference.) She shared a story that Sister Ashton (wife of Marvin J. Ashton) had told of President Kimball. President Kimball and Harold B. Lee were good friends. And President Kimball really admired President Lee and often told him so and would say he wished he could be more like President Lee. Finally one day Harold B. Lee said something like, "Spencer, the Lord doesn't want two Harold B. Lees. He just wants you to be the best Spencer W. Kimball you can be."

Maria Covey Cole went on to say this: "A copy is never as valuable as an original. Each of us is an original made by God and we diminish ourselves and our Maker when we question our worth."

Wow! Not much to say about that, other than wow! One of the CD's by Sheri Dew was entitled Four Things that will Wreck our Lives and the Four Truths that will Save it. She said that if she were Satan there would be four things she would do to try to draw us away from the gospel and the Savior and one of them was to get us to compare, criticize and complain.... to compare ourselves to others and to criticize and complain about others.

Maria Covey Cole said, "We need to do more affirming and encouraging and less comparing and finding fault. There is a great reservoir of strength and sisterhood surrounding us. All we must do is choose to recognize, embrace and encourage those around us rather than compare ourselves to one another."

I know some pretty amazing, talented, beautiful, spiritual women and it is easy at times to wish I was more like them in some way or another. But it gives me hope/peace to know that Heavenly Father created me and that he just wants me to be the best Jenny Panameno I can be...and that he doesn't want me to try to be just like someone else. I can learn from them and allow them to bless my life and the lives of my family members...but stop wishing to be them or regretting that I am not the same as them.

No Riding in the House Without A Helmet

I recently read a great book called No Riding in the House Without A Helmet by Melissa Fay Green. It was a great book. It was about a couple that had four biological children that eventually adopted five more children...one from Bulgaria and the rest from Ethiopia. It was such a touching book and humorous book. I literally laughed out loud repeatedly. But I was also reminded of how fortunate we are to live in this nation. I know that, but I think it is always good to have a reminder from time to time. As I read about the lives that these children came from as well as their struggles to adapt to America, a new family, etc...to be integrated and yet to still retain their culture and identity...I was so grateful for the blessings I have been given. We take so much for granted...education, sufficient food, a stable family, even non-necessities like cars, tvs, and so on. Reading this book made me wish that I was in a position that I could do more to help others in poverty whether through adoption or volunteer work or some other avenue. I am not in a position to do that, at least right now, but I can try to do a little ...by teaching my children gratitude, by expressing gratitude myself and recognizing the blessings I have, by giving a generous fast offering and donating to the humanitarian efforts of the church and/or other relief organizations. And by trying my best, each day, while I am in my classroom to make the lives of my second graders a little better, a little happier. They are, in no means, in the destitute poverty of so many others around the world. However, many of them do have difficult home lives and I hope that in some small way I am making a difference in their lives as well as the lives of my own children.

Graveside Service

Last Saturday was my grandpa's graveside service. It was short and simple as he requested but beautiful. He is buried next to my great grandparents and is in a beautiful spot, near the mountains. Quite a few family members came that I hadn't expected to see. I was happy to see my grandpa's brother, my great uncle Jay. He's in his late 80s and his health isn't good, but it was wonderful to see him. I've always loved him. Several of my dad's cousins came as well as all of my grandparents' children except one. I am certain that had the service been held in Arizona (where my grandparents lived for about 50 years) then many more people would have been there to honor my grandpa.


My grandpa has always loved bagpipe music and played the bagpipes, at least a little. So there was a bagpipe player there, and that brought tears to my eyes. My aunt Julia said the opening prayer, my dad's Bishop said a few words, my uncle Tom gave the dedicatory prayer and my uncle Dan said the closing prayer. Then my grandfather received his full military honors, including having Neil Bills play Taps and present the flag. In the program, a few words penned by my grandpa were included. He wrote:


"And now the end is near,
and soon I'll face the final curtain.
To make things very clear,
I will state my case of which I'm certain.
I've lived a life that's full,
I've traveled many highways and byways.
But more, much more than this,
I tried to do it His way.


Regrets I have a few and some
sins that I won't mention.
I did what I thought I had to do
and carried through without exemption.
I faced my foes and took their blows
and tried to forgive the way the Savior shows.
And through it all, I tried to stand tall,
and do it His way."

--Reed Gordon Bills


I can think of no tribute more fitting for my grandpa than his own words. He, of course, wasn't perfect, but he was truly one of the greatest men I have ever known. And he did forgive others, love others, serve, and try to do it His way, to emulate the Savior's example.

After the graveside service, we had a small luncheon at my Uncle Dan and Aunt Suzanne's church. Several people had brought memorabilia.... his honorable discharge from the military, wedding certificate, photos, and so on. Several aunts, uncles and cousins shared their memories and thoughts.

I don't want to forget his jokes about the brick and the dog...and so I'm going to type it here. I just want to say that the delivery really matters (and as my aunt Julia said, perhaps you have to be a Bills to find it funny.) But, it is something I don't want forgotten. So here it is. A long time ago, there was a man who wanted a large building built. He found someone to hire to build the building with a thousand bricks. The agreement was that he must use every brick to build the building and if he did, he would earn a large sum of money. So day after day, the man worked on constructing the building. When it was finally complete, one brick was missing. So the man didn't earn a penny.


Second joke. Once there was a lady on a train. She had her dog traveling with her. She loved her dog. She carried him in her lap and lovingly petted him. Sitting next to her was a man with a cigar. He smoked and smoked and it made the woman cough and bothered her dog. She politely asked the man to stop smoking. He refused. She replied that it was bothering her and her precious dog. Then she grabbed the cigar and threw it out the train window. The man grabbed her dog and threw it out the train window. Outraged and worried, the woman pulled the cord to stop the train. The conductor came rushing down to see what was the matter. She said the man had thrown her dog out the window and the man yelled that she'd thrown his cigar out the window. The train stopped and they got off the train to look for the dog. The dog came running toward the woman and what do you think he had in his mouth?


(pause)....the brick! :) This always elicits a laugh from those of us lucky enough to hear my grandpa tell it.

My aunt Julia read a quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson: SUCCESS

To laugh often and much
to win the respect of intelligent people
and affection of children; to earn the
appreciation of honest critics and
endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty, to find the best
in others; to leave the world a bit
better, whether by a healthy child
a garden patch or redeemed
social condition; to know even
one life has breathed easier because
you have lived. This is to have
succeeded.


-Ralph Waldo Emerson

She concluded by saying that far more than one person has breathed easier because he lived. That quote really describes him so well. My uncle Bruce shared some memories of the copper mine near Vernal that they had years ago...when they were young. He also said that he remembers my grandpa saying something like we eat when it is time to eat, we rest when it is time to rest and we work the rest of the time. And he lived by that. He worked hard. He was injured in WWII and was in pain throughout most of his life, but that didn't cause him to slow down nor did it lead him to complain.

I am so grateful that my life was touched by his in countless ways. I love him so much and I am so grateful that he doesn't have to suffer any more. I am grateful that he is reunited with loved ones that have already departed this life. I am grateful for the knowledge that I will see him again. I just have to live my life so that I will be worthy of that priviledge.