Kindness

This Christmas, I have been so touched by the kindness I have experienced. As I mentioned, someone did a 12 Days of Christmas for our family. My children looked so forward to receiving the gift each day. It was so kind and made our season extra special. It made us feel very loved.

On December 23, I took Gabby to get her ears pierced at the mall. Afterward, the girls and I were sitting at a table in the mall eating ice cream cones. We saw a man with three boys. They were all wearing elf hats. One of the boys, probably ten years old, walked up to me, handed me an envelope and said Merry Christmas. Then he walked away. The envelope said Merry Christmas and had $20 inside. We saw them give a couple more away, and they had several more envelopes in their hands. Made. My. Day. There are so many good people in this world.

I now have the envelope hanging in my office to remind me of this kindness.

That same day, Alfredo went to Kneaders. He had preordered some pies. When he got there to pick them up, the pies weren't ready. It took 45 minutes for them to get them ready. The employee that was helping him said they would give him a platter of desserts for free to make up for their error. They were very apologetic. When the pies were ready, the manager gave him his receipt...and he had not only given him the platter of desserts for free, they had not charged him for the pies at all. Alfredo politely argued and said that was too much and he would pay for the pies. The manager said the mistake was theirs, they wanted him to be a repeat customer and the entire order was on them. Great customer service. Great kindness.

These are what Christmas is all about. Helping others. Showing love to friends, neighbors and random strangers. I didn't DO anything to deserve these acts of kindness...my family didn't NEED these gifts, at least not in a financial sense, but maybe our hearts did. It made this Christmas just a bit more special, just a bit more jolly. I am so thankful. These acts taught my children (and me) about the true spirit of Christmas better than any lesson I could have given. We are anxious to "pay it forward" in the future.

George Matthew Adams said, "Let us remember that the Christmas heart is a giving heart, a wide open heart that thinks of others first. The birth of the baby Jesus stands as the most significant event in all history, because it has meant the pouring into a sick world the healing medicine of love which has transformed all manner of hearts for almost two thousand years... Underneath all the bulging bundles is this beating Christmas heart." I'm thankful for so many who have that true Christmas heart and have shared it with us this year.

December 10-20 Gratitude

Tuesday,December 10: giving thanks and opportunities to learn Continuing to reflect on what I am grateful for is helping me so much. I am feeling more peace and joy, despite the busy-ness of the season. And somehow I am feeling more caught up than I had been feeling or usually feel at this time of year. Giving thanks for what I have really does make a difference. It changes things. Or more accurately, it changes me.

It has been a year now since I was called into the Bishop's office and extended a calling as Relief Society President. It has been a year filled with so many emotions and so many experiences, so much growth and learning. I sometimes say that I would love to be called to nursery or to the little ones in Primary...and there is truth in that. I love the little children. They love unconditionally and they are sweet, energetic and innocent. But, at the same time, I would feel so sad to be released right now. I would never have asked for this responsibility, but I am thankful each day that The Lord knew how it would bless my life. I have learned so much. I love these women so very much, and I am blessed by the opportunity to love and serve them. I feel my Savior's love for them and for me. I have learned better to rely on the spirit and listen for its promptings. And I feel like I still have so much more to accomplish and to learn. I love to learn, both secularly and spiritually, and I am thankful for the opportunities I am presented with to learn.

Wednesday, December 11: doctors Today right after school, I got a call from my children's school. Gabby slipped on ice and fell. She split her chin open and needed stitches. I hurried over. When I arrived she and her sisters were in the after school program office, and Michelle and Gabby were hugging each other. Michelle had tears in her eyes, and Gabby was comforting Michelle. She was saying, "I am ok. It's going to be okay." The after school leader told me that she had said, "I just don't want my mom to freak out. I am okay, but I don't want her to freak out." (I DO NOT do blood. It makes me dizzy. I am not calm and collected when there is blood.). So we hurried to an Instacare by our house, and Gabby said it hurt a few times, but she was pretty calm. She cried a bit, but not too much. When we got there, the nurse who examined Gabby was young. She spoke English and Spanish and volunteers at their school (very cool since it isn't near our house...quite a neat coincidence/blessing from The Lord). She told Gabby that if she didn't cry during the stitches, she could have three Popsicles. She cleaned Gabby's chin, put on a gel to numb it and then covered it with tape like stuff. Then we had to wait 20 minutes for it to get numb. Gabby was calm and happy. Then the doctor and nurse came in and she held very still. I held her hand (but had to sit down after a few minutes because I was getting very dizzy) and she was a trooper. She held still, did not cry and was completely calm as the doctor stitched her up. She was so brave...and she happily accepted her three Popsicles.


That night Alfredo and I had his company dinner and they had a babysitter. Gabby had a hard time. She was tired, her chin hurt, and she wanted me to be there with her. But Michelle and Ella helped the babysitter and took good care of her. I was so proud of them.

I am so thankful for doctors. It is not a job I could do. But I am so thankful for those who can. I am grateful for our pediatrician. We had Dr. Wall for nine years, but he left the practice we go to. So now we have Dr. Barrett. They are both great. I am grateful for doctors, hospitals, medication and the blessings of modern medicine.

Thursday, December 12: Alfredo's company As I mentioned, last night was Alfredo's company Christmas dinner. I am thankful for his job. I am thankful for the good health care, retirement and profit sharing benefits that his company provides. I am thankful that he has a job that he enjoys. I am thankful for the income he receives. But most importantly, some of our dearest friends are fellow employees. I am thankful for the friendships that we have all been blessed with because he has this job. These relationships have certainly blessed his life and made his job more enjoyable, but they have also been a blessing for me and for my children.

Friday, December 13: my home. It was so nice tonight to stay home with my family, relax, make gingerbread houses, and spend time together. I am thankful for a nice home to live in. I am thankful for a warm bed, a heater, a kitchen with appliances, a washing machine, and all of the other things we have in our home that make it a nice place to live.



Saturday, December 14th: 12 Days of Christmas. Someone is anonymously giving us gifts for the 12 Days of Christmas. On the first day (yesterday) we got hot chocolate with marshmellows. The second day: Christmas towels. Third day: popcorn. Fourth day: wrapping paper. My kids really want to figure out who is giving it to us. They tried running to the door to see if they could see who it was. When we got the towels, they were sniffing the towels to see if they could figure out whose house they came from. Silly girls. Truly, we live in the best neighborhood on the planet. I hope we don't figure out for sure who is giving them to us, but either way, I am so thankful.


Sunday, Dec. 15: teaching. I love teaching. Sometimes I get a little nervous to teach adults, but I still love teaching. I love teaching school, Primary, Young Womens, and Relief Society. I like the interaction between myself and whoever I am teaching. I like the opportunity to learn new things and gain new insights. When it comes to gospel teaching, I always feel like I gain so much from preparing the lesson. It helps me come to understand the gospel so much better. So when one of our teachers let me know on Saturday evening that she was ill and wouldn't be there at church on Sunday morning, I was grateful for the chance to teach. Sorry that our teacher was sick, and I would always prefer more time to prepare, but grateful to have the chance to teach. The lesson was on Jesus Christ...no better topic to teach on, especially this time of year. I shared quotes from President Snow from the manual. I also shared some quotes from a wonderful article in this month's Ensign by Elder Porter entitled Come, Let Us Adore Him. And I was able to share a video clip from Elder Holland's book For Times of Trouble where he and Sister Holland bear testimony of the Savior. It really helped me to feel and express love and gratitude for my Savior. I am so grateful that I have so many opportunities to teach in both secular and spiritual settings.

Monday, Dec. 16: clothing, esp. warm clothing. It was finally warm enough for our students to go outside for recess today. That, in and of itself, is a cause for celebration/gratitude!! But as I headed outside for recess duty, I was very thankful for a sweater, boots, hoodie, and warm jacket. I am thankful to have shoes to wear and a wide variety of outfits to wear. I am thankful that I have scarves, jackets, gloves, and warm socks. I am thankful for the abundance I have been blessed with.

Tues., Dec. 17: Art I am no artist, but I enjoy doing art projects with my children and my students. We are doing darling but time consuming salt dough handprint Santas with our students. We spent most of the afternoon doing art rotations as a grade level so we could work on this project. We are very fortunate to have an art teacher at our school this year. We received a Beverly Sorensen Taylor art grant. It is wonderful to have a talented art teacher teach our students.

Wednesday, Dec. 18:Christmas cards I love receiving Christmas cards. I love seeing photos of loved ones and reading letters about how their families are doing. Usually Alfredo brings in the mail, but in December I am much more likely to grab the mailbox contents so I can open Christmas cards. I hang them on a door and find myself stopping to look at the photos or to think about these dear Fred's and family members that we love.

Thursday, Dec. 19: Prayer. I am thankful for the gift of prayer. I am thankful for the comfort and peace it brings. I am so thankful for the guidance it often brings to me. I know that our prayers are heard and answered. They aren't always answered in the way we would like or in our timetable. But The Lord does hear. He does answer. I have had many prayers answered personally and have had opportunities to pray for others and sometimes see me Lord answer these prayers as well. I am thankful that my children are learning to pray. When something gets lost or the roads are bad or we experience other day to day challenges, they often ask if we can pray. They have faith. It strengthens mine.

My uncle has been hospitalized with pneumonia since Thanksgiving. He has had complication after complication. He is not doing well. We have been praying sincerely for him. He won't be home for Christmas. I am very concerned for him. But I have faith that our prayers are being heard, and that whatever happens will be His will. Recently on Facebook, I saw this quote by Corrie Ten Boom. "When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer." So, too, when we go through times that feel dark and troubling, we trust our Engineer, our Father, that brighter days are ahead and that He is in control of our journey and ultimate destination if we trust him. Prayer is a blessing. It helps align our will with His.

Friday, Dec. 20: A vacation. Today was our last day before winter break. It was a fun day. We had a field trip to see a play called Snow White Christmas. Soo fun. It was a panto, so it was interactive. After school, ee was a luncheon for all the teachers. Then my kids and I drove to Alfredo's company where they got to see Santa. I was awesome...free, only a five minute wait, and I got photos. This evening Alfredo and Iare going to the last Christmas party of the season at a friend's home. And I now have two weeks off and will spend one week of it in Arizona with my family. So very happy and thankful!

Dec. 2-9 Gratitude

Dec. 2: I am so thankful for my sisters. I have two remarkably talented, intelligent and wonderful sisters. I am the oldest, but I learn so much from them. They are great examples to me.

My sister, Rebecca, faces challenges with courage and faith. She is an incredible mother, and has done tremendous research and made significant changes to help her children. Her children have food sensitivities that limit what they can eat. Her youngest was diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder, and my sister has studied, prayed and then implemented dietary changes, biomedical treatments and intensive therapy to help my niece. My niece is making significant improvements. My sister and her amazing husband work tirelessly to help thei children reach their potential, and she is so incredibly patient. In addition, she is a talented photographer, took woodworking classes in high school and has developed skills in woodworking and upholstering. She is a great listener, and she is a hard worker. I am blessed to have such an amazing sister. I wish she were closer, but I so treasure the times when we are together.

My sister, Suzy, is an editor. She does freelance editing and teaches a couple of editing classes at BYU, our alma mater. (My sisters and I all graduated from the Y.) She has a strong testimony and desire to do what is right. She is a very hard worker. She is also very disciplined. She runs marathons and trains for them year round...running between 10-20 miles most days. She is very talented musically, and plays the piano beautifully. She is also a great aunt to my children. They love their Aunt Suzy.

Both of my sisters help me in countless ways. They are an inspiration to me.

Tuesday, Dec. 3: Today was not a great day. I have now lived in Utah for more than half my life, but I still don't like cold weather, and I hate driving in snow.

It took3 hours to get home tonight. There were tears shed...mostly by me. My children had to do their homework in the car. They were tired, starving, and began arguing. I tried to stay calm, but I wasn't entirely successful. I was cranky and frustrated and anxious. A funny/gross thing is that near the end we all needed to go the bathroom so bad, esp. me. We were just sitting, barely moving. I seriously contemplated just putting my car in park, and hopping out to go on the side of the road ...with cars all around us. I am sure I would have had time...but my modesty won out. I seriously worried that when I finally stood up to get out of the car that I would lose my bladder right then and there, but we made it. I guess that's something to be thankful for, right? Today while I was in the car, I thought, "I need to think of what I'm grateful for. That will help me feel better." But the only thing I could find to be thankful for after such a long day was that it was NOT the day of the street party, our RS Christmas dinner (so glad we did that early) or any other commitment because I would not have made it. (Now that I'm home, I can also recognize how grateful I am to be home, to be safe, and that I didn't pee my pants.)

Wednesday, Dec. 4: Today I am thankful for driving safely. As much as I dislike driving in the snow, I am grateful that I have been protected this week and in many instances in the past. I am thankful that I was able to drive safely to/from work and piano lessons. I am thankful that the commute did not take very long. I am thankful that the Lord has protected us from harm when weather conditions are bad.

Thursday, Dec. 5: Today I am thankful that Alfredo took my car to have it's brakes fixed. They needed to be replaced, and it is too cold for him to do it outside in the carport. He found someone that did it for an incredibly reasonable rate, and he got it all taken care of so I wouldn't have to. So grateful that he takes good care of me and of our cars.

Friday, Dec. 6: We have an annual street party at Christmas time. It is a tradition that started over 20 years ago, I believe. We've been participating for nearly 10 years now. (We didn't attend the first couple of years that we lived in our house.) It is a progressive dinner. We begin at one house for appetizers, move to another house for dinner, and then end at a third house for dessert and a white elephant gift exchange. It is a party for adults only, and we love it. We laugh and talk and eat good food and the white elephant gift exchange is a riot. This year our numbers were few, but it was just as fun as it always is. I am thankful to live in a neighborhood where I know nearly everyone on my street and many, many other people in the surrounding streets. A neighborhood where I feel safe. A neighborhood where we are treated with love and respect. I could not be happier with where we live. Our house is not perfect, but my life has been so blessed by those we call our neighbors and friends.

Sat., Dec. 7:
Good babysitters: We needed a babysitter last night, and we got a babysitter tonight to go on a date. We will have another babysitter next week, and one the following weekend. I am grateful that there are so many reliable teenagers in our area that I can trust to watch our girls. My girls love having babysitters, and I am thankful that we have several that we trust and that seem to enjoy our kids as much as our kids enjoy them. And it's nice to know that soon we won't need babysitters at all. Michelle is getting old enough to be our babysitter.

Date night: Alfredo and I went to dinner and then we watched Catching Fire. I was excited to see the movie. I have read the books and really liked them. So I was looking forward to the movie, and it was wonderful. I had tears in my eyes in several parts, and it was well done. I still think the books are even better, but the movie was great. And it was nice to have some time with just Alfredo.

Sun., Dec. 8: I am thankful for our Bishopric. It has been wonderful to get to know them better and serve with them this past year. They are wonderful men who love the Lord and who love the members of our ward. In ward council today, Bishop bore a powerful testimony of the importance and power of prayer. He encouraged us that when troubles and trials came, we should run toward our Father in prayer and not away.

As a parent, I really appreciate that the Bishop has the children visit him after church each Sunday. They share what they learned in Primary and then get a candy. My children have come to know and love the Bishop because of this routine. And I think it helps them pay attention in Primary so they know what to tell the Bishop.

We had tithing settlement today. I am thankful for the blessings of paying tithing. I am thankful for the ways that my family has been blessed and strengthened as I have paid tithing. I feel so thankful that I am able to serve in this church and to pay tithing to contribute to the building of churches, temples, and other church work. I am thankful that my family and I could visit with the Bishop for a few minutes and declare to him (and more importantly to the Lord) that we pay our tithing.

He has only a few more months to serve as Bishop, and I know that whoever follows will be a wonderful Bishop and will bless the ward. But I am so thankful for what Bishop DeLaMare has done for my family and for the ward.

Mon., Dec. 9:Christmas books I love books. I love Christmas. So I have always enjoyed reading Christmas books to/with my children. But then I heard about a fun tradition of wrapping up Christmas books and opening one each day all month long. So last year we began that new tradition. Each night, one of the girls gets to select a wrapped book and we snuggle together and read it. (For my sake, I label the gifts long, medium, and short and tell them what length of book we have time for that night.) This year, we started on Thanksgiving and I am loving it. Some of the books are fun and silly, some are religious in nature. But we enjoy this time reading together. A few of my favorites include The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey; Mary, Did You Know; The Pirate's Night Before Christmas, and The Little Shepherd's Christmas. I own about 30 Christmas books, so we have enough. But I usually check out a few books from the library so that we have a few they haven't read or seen before. After we read them, they go in a basket so the girls can reread them if they choose. I love this tradition. I wish I had started it sooner, but I am glad I started it. Better late than never, right?

Ten Books

My friend, Laurie, tagged me on Facebook asking me to post a list of 10 books that touched me or stayed with me in some way. The rules said to not think too hard...they don't have to be the right books or great works, just ones that have touched you. So I posted my list on Facebook. It wasn't as easy as it sounds. I read about 50 chapter books a year (and hundreds of picture books). Many of these are books that touch me in some way or make me think. But here are the 10 I listed. They are in no particular order, but unlike on Facebook I am going to explain why I listed them.
1. Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky...
I read this first in high school (and at least once or twice since and I don't reread most books...although many on this list of 10 I have reread). I appreciated the fact that Dostoevsky is able to help you see inside a criminal's mind and feel compassion for him and understand his actions. It (and other books like it) have helped me to recognize that we can't judge people just by their actions...to really understand that while we do abhor the sin, we don't condemn the sinner.
2. A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
My parents read this to me when I was very young. It puzzled and intrigued me. Then I reread it when I got a little older. I read it again in college and loved that I recognized so many of the quotes that one of the characters uses from my readings of the classics. It deals with light/dark, love/hate, and other important themes. I have now read it with my oldest children. I love it!
3. Where the Mountain Meets the Moon by Grace Lin
This is a children's book that is set in China. It is about a little girl, Minli, whose family is very poor. But her father always tells her stories. Minli decides to set out to try to change her family's fortune, having a number of adventures as she goes, and she learns that the greatest fortunes do not come from having wealth but from having gratitude in our hearts. I love that all of the stories are interconnected. I love the lessons Minli and her family learn. I read this last November and this year my children and I listened to it on CD during November. I may make that a new tradition...to read it each year during November. It helps me remember what is really important.
4. Love Anthony by Lisa Genova
This is a beautiful book about a woman whose son was severely autistic. After his death, she is trying to come to terms with his life, his autism and his death. It was beautifully written, somewhat heart-wrenching, but with a peaceful conclusion. When I am faced with things I don't understand, I often read multiple books about them. So I have read a number of novels that have characters that fall on the autism spectrum. This is perhaps my favorite, although there have been others that also touched me.
5. The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom
I am so impressed by Corrie Ten Boom. I've read two or three books by her, and I am impressed by her compassion, love, and forgiveness, particularly for those who mistreated her and her family. Despite being sent to the concentration camps and suffering terribly, she gave thanks for all she had...even the fleas and lice. I want to be more like her.
6. To the Rescue
I love President Monson. He is a wonderful example, and he truly has spent his life going to the rescue of the lonely, the sick, the lost, the sad. I learned so much from reading his biography and reflect regularly on ways that I can improve and better serve others around me. I especially reflect on the chapters about the saints in East Germany and their faithfulness. I am so very blessed, and my life is really fairly easy...it shouldn't be hard to make time to do visiting teaching when all of those I visit teach live within a few blocks of me. It shouldn't be hard to make it to the temple when I have 4 within a 20 minute drive and many more within an hour or two's drive. I am so blessed. Yet despite living in a communist country in abject poverty, the East German Saints had a remarkable activity rate (over 90% if I remember correctly) and they did their home/visiting teaching even when it meant traveling for hours. They sacrificed much. I can do better.
7. Expecting Adam by Martha Beck
This book is about Beck's pregnancy with a child (Adam) who they learned would have Down Syndrome. Many people thought she should abort the baby, but they chose to keep Adam and this tells of the experiences she had as she was expecting Adam and the miracles she experienced. The part I love the most and that I reread often
was about her going jogging one day and seeing what she thought was quartz. She was excited as she reached down to pick it up, thinking she had found this beautiful mineral,glistening in the sun. But when she picked it up, it was actually styrofoam and she dropped it disgusted. But then she began thinking about this... her reaction had totally changed when she found out what it was, not because the object had changed (it was always styrofoam, and it had still looked pretty), but because her label for the object had changed...one label was precious mineral, the other garbage. She began to think about how our labels for people changed how we saw them, and for the rest of the day she tried to see people without labels. She didn't last long, she began to cry beause the people around her were so beautiful. She writes, "This was enough to make me wonder if many of the things I reviled as ugly might not in fact be beautiful, if I might be robbing myself of beauty with my own cognitive prejudice." Martha Beck also writes, "If we saw people as they really are, the beauty would overwhelm us. (pages 307-308)"
8. Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
I tried to read this in college and couldn't get into it. In fact, I started it at least twice before finally reading it all the way through. But I ended up loving it. Sometimes we have to give things a second (or third) chance before we decide whether it is worth doing.
9. Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer adn Annie Barrows
I am fascinated by WWII. I have read so many books about WWII, and particularly about the Holocaust. (See what I mean, when I don't understand something, I read and read and read about it.) I don't just read about the holocaust, though. I've read books about the Japanese internment camps and about the war in general. So I knew that I wanted to choose a book about WWII, and I loved this book. So partly I chose it because I really loved it, and I do reflect back on it. But partly I chose it to represent all of the books I've read about this historical period.
10. Outliers by Malcom Gladwell
I don't read as much nonfiction as I do fiction. But I have found Gladwell's books interesting. And this one in particular. I found his discussion about why Asian students perform better (in general) in math than US students very interesting. I also reflect often on the concept that achieving the American dream isn't about luck, but it is about being in the right place at the right time and then putting in the hours to get the experience needed to be successful. I reflect back on this book a lot.

Gratitude

It is December 1st. November is over. Thanksgiving is past. But I have so much more I am thankful for. What's more, I know that the saying "We do not give thanks because we are happy, we are happy because we give thanks." (Douglas Wood) is a true statement. I am now beginning the month of December which is one of my favorite and one of my most stressful times of year. I love it, but it often overwhelms me. But I am beginning December feeling very calm and peaceful and happy. I know that giving thanks daily has been part of what has helped me feel that way. And I want this feeling to continue. So I'm going to continue to give thanks throughout December.

And today, I am thankful for quotes about gratitude. They help me remember how important giving thanks is. Here are a few I like:

"This is a wonderful time to be living here on earth. Our opportunities are limitless. While there are some things wrong in the world today, there are many things right, such as teachers who teach, ministers who minister, marriages that make it, parents who sacrifice, and friends who help.
We can lift ourselves, and others as well, when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues" (Thomas S. Monson, "An Attitude of Gratitude," Ensign, May 1992, 54).

"The thankful heart opens our eyes to a multitude of blessings that continually surround us." --James E. Faust

A quote from a favorite book, Where the Mountain Meets the Moon, which I read with my children this month: "The woman cursed herself for her selfishness and foolishness. How lucky she had been! She was at last able to see that her daughter's laughter and love could not be improved by having the finest clothes or jewels, that joy had been in her home like a gift waiting to be opened. The woman wept tears for which there was no comfort. For all the time that she had been longing for treasures, she had already had the one most precious." p. 254

"To express gratitude is honorable, to enact gratitude is generous and noble, but to live with gratitude ever in our hearts is to touch heaven." -President Monson

"When we give cheerfully and accept gratefully, everyone is blessed.”
― Maya Angelou

“We should certainly count our blessings, but we should also make our blessings count.”
― Neal A. Maxwell

And this hymn has been echoing in my mind for days, "Because I have been given much, I, too, must give. Because of thy great bounty, Lord, each day I live. I shall divide my gifts from thee, with every brother that I see. Thus shall my thanks be thanks, indeed." (Hymn 219)