Birthday Heartache Attitude

 Friday was Michelle's 18th birthday.  18!!!  How is that even possible?  And I think she had a good day.  A friend took her out to lunch.  She visited with a couple of friends.  She got gifts that she really loved.  I had cookies delivered to her as a surprise in the middle of the day.  On Saturday, we went out to dinner as a family.  I think she felt loved.  

But there was also at least a little bit of heartbreak.  At least on my end.  Maybe it didn't bother her as much as it did me, though I suspect it did.  She wanted to celebrate her birthday by having several friends come over.  She wanted her best friend to sleep over but several others to come over and hang out and watch a movie.  A couple of the people she invited said they couldn't make it, but there were supposed to be 5 coming.  One of them did go to lunch with her earlier in the day.  And a couple of them said they would be a bit late.  They were supposed to come around 7.  I bought pizzas, chips, and sodas.  And her best friend, Morgan, showed up and they began talking and laughing and having a good time.  Around 9, another friend came and dropped off a gift and said she couldn't stay but happy birthday.  And she literally only stayed like 1-2 minutes.  Two other friends texted to say they weren't going to make it after all.  And maybe they all had legitimate reasons, I don't know. And Michelle, Ella, Gabby and Morgan seemed to have a good time.  Michelle seemed to stay happy.  But I felt crushed inside...and honestly, pretty angry.  I don't understand not showing up to a friend's on an important event.  And it just seems that this year, some of her friends haven't been very good friends at all.  It's been a hard year, and I guess I don't know what each of them is going through.  But I felt so sad.  I think my kids are pretty incredible--imperfect and human and flawed as we all are--but kind and funny and good.  And so I don't understand why it seems like she has struggled in the friendship department.  I hope and pray that she will have truly great friends when she heads to Utah State.  I wish I knew or understood why some people seem to find it so easy to make and keep friends and others struggle.  But I know some people that are genuinely kind and good that struggle.  I'm proud of her for seeming to focus her mind and thoughts on the positive parts of her day.