As I mentioned in a previous post, I've been reading Remember by Lisa Genova. It was really interesting and I've found myself talking about it with several people. I already created one post about it, but I wanted to do another post with my take aways. Some of them I already mentioned, but the more you read, write and talk about something the more likely you are to remember it (although not necessarily accurately...if you rehearse inaccuracies, you will remember inaccuracies).
The biggest thing I want to remember is that while our memories aren't our whole selves, the way we store and retrieve memories can have a big impact on our happiness. In any vacation, event, etc. there is usually a combination of good and bad. If we focus on, discuss, recount, and replay the bad parts then our overall feeling is going to be that it was bad. If we focus on, discuss, recount and replay the good parts then our overall memory is going to be that it was good. Now this doesn't mean that we should only remember the good or try to pretend that nothing bad ever happens. But the way we tell the story matters. For example, I've told several people that I nearly died climbing Izalco and then I laugh and say that's an exaggeration...but that it was very hard for me. If I focus my thoughts and retelling on how hard it is, as time passes I may forget how Ella stayed with me for the climb down from Izalco and how Alfredo stayed with me as we climbed back up Cerro Verde. I may forget how they both encouraged me and helped me keep going. I may forget that Isaiah 40 and the song "Walk Tall" gave me strength and how I repeated to myself "I am strong. I'm a daughter of God. I am courageous" to help me keep going. I may forget that even though (or perhaps because) it was SO hard, I felt a sense of accomplishment that I finished. But if I rehearse those parts, then over time the memory will be more complete and include the good and the bad. It's all in how I capture and retrieve those memories.
Some other things I learned (and these come from the appendix where she summarizes what she taught but are a great compilation of the most important lessons):
1. We must be paying attention if we want to remember. Avoid distractions. Stop multi-tasking. Focus.
2. Pay attention to visual cues. Make a mental picture of what you are trying to remember. If taking notes for a class, draw pictures or make charts or tables. Visualize what you are learning about. IF POSSIBLE: Make it about you. Visualize yourself in that battle at Antietam. Remember how the general's name is the same as your uncle's and how it occurred on the same day as your sister's birthday.
3. Make it meaningful. When you are trying to learn or remember something, relate it to something you care about a lot. Create a story. This is how mnemonics work. ROYGBIV sounds like a man's name and so you can remember the colors in the rainbow. Never eat shredded wheat (or soggy waffles) helps you remember cardinal directions.
4. Use your imagination. If you're going to the grocery store and need 5 items, visualize getting milk from your mailbox, cheese sitting right next to your door as you unlock it, avocados where you hang up your keys and take off your shoes, tortillas at the top of the stairs, and chicken on the kitchen counter. Then when you get to the store, visualize yourself getting home, getting the mail, going inside and hanging up your keys and then going to the kitchen. Picturing this routine will help you remember the items you need to buy as you picture each location. Or if you need to remember someone's name, attach meaning to it and create a story. If the person's name is Chris Baker, picture a man wearing a chef's hat standing next to a Christmas tree...Chris (from Christmas) Baker...baker.
5. Location matters. If you're creating a story (as described in #4), put the story in a specific location. As you are trying to recall an event, something you need to do, or a fact you learned, returning to the location where you learned/experienced that fact or event often opens the floodgates of memory. Sometimes just returning to the location in your mind's eye can help you remember what you are trying to recall. So pay attention to the setting when important events are happening. Record as many details as you can.
6. Emotion... we remember events when high emotions are attached. We remember when we are scared, sad, happy, surprised, etc. Emotion tells your amygdala that what is happening is important and your amygdala tells your hippocampus (where memories are formed) to pay attention. So if you want to remember something attach emotion to it!
7. Rehearse and retell and record...the more you retell an event or think about it or write about it, the better you will remember it...though this can interfere with accuracy. Retelling or thinking about an event enhances the neural circuitry that help you retrieve memories...but each time you do this, you overwrite the previous telling of the memory and so you can also delete or add information over time and your brain will think that your new telling of the story is accurate. After 9/11 a bunch of young adults were asked to write about their experiences on that day...where they were, who they were with, what they were doing, etc. Then a few years later, they were asked to answer the same questions. Their answers often varied drastically...and when shown their previous written responses, written just shortly after the event, they believed their current version of what they thought happened, not the written version given just after the event.
8. Leave behind your routine. We don't remember every meal we eat or every shower we take or every commute to work (thank goodness!). So if you want something to be memorable, do something new and different. Eat dinner on top of a mountain while smelling fresh pine and watching the sunset. Take a cold shower next to the beach in El Salvador when the humidity is high and you've just spilled fresh coconut water on yourself. These will be things you might remember.
9. Practice. Repeat and rehearse. Quiz yourself. Learn the skill beyond mastery--so you are getting 100% when you quiz yourself and then you keep studying a bit more. Practice a skill over and over and over. Look back at photos, keep a journal, tell stories about your life, look back at social media memories.
10. Use strong retrieval cues. If you drink Dr. Pepper while studying for a test, drink Dr. Pepper while taking the test. Create events on your calendar or place your pillbox in an obvious place so you are reminded of things you need to do. Pay attention to smells because they are powerful for retrieving memories. Perhaps wear a specific perfume when you study for a test and the same perfume when taking a test. (I read once that it's a good idea to have a perfume that you use every time you want to be intimate...just smelling that fragrance will help trigger those memories and emotions for your partner. I haven't tried this, but maybe it's a good idea.) When something important is happening, pay attention to the sights, sounds, smells and feelings because that gives you many ways to access that memory in the future.
11. Believe in yourself and your memory. If you tell yourself your memory is failing and that you aren't good at remembering things, your memory does more poorly than if you tell yourself that you have a great memory. (Maybe this is part of the key for my ability to recall scriptures and quotes from apostles...my patriarchal blessing tells me this is one of my gifts and I believe it and tell myself and others that I can and so that helps me to be able to.)
12. Limit stress. Exercise, practice mindfulness, do yoga, express gratitude do whatever you need to do to limit chronic stress.
13. Get 7-9 hours of sleep a night. This is the BIGGEST thing you can do to help prevent Alzheimers! Sleep is when your body clears away the plaques that lead to Alzheimers but if you aren't regularly sleeping at least 7 hours, your body is unable to do that.
14. Eat right. Fruits, vegetables, fish high in Omega-3's.
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