Post Judging Inclusion

I have seen a lot of posts lately that talk about only being friends with those who are easy to talk to and totally get you or that are willing to put just as much effort into the relationship as you are or similar concepts.

One person that I love dearly shared a post today that said, "I want to be around people who do things.  I don't want to be around people anymore that judge or talk about what people do.  I want to be around people that dream and support and do things."

And I get what it is saying, but it also kind of bugged me.  I think I was able to respond politely but share a different perspective.  Because first...who doesn't dream?  We might dream of different things but we all have dreams!  

My response:   "Just a slightly different perspective.  So often when I find myself judging it comes from both a place of concern and often also a place of insecurity.  What I need when I am being judgmental is not less love but more.  Not to have people cut me out of their lives but to more fully bring me in.  And sometimes I need a new perspective.  Because maybe there's something I don't understand.  Or maybe I need to remember that we ALL have our weaknesses.  And life reminds me of my own pretty regularly.

Other than in the case of those who are abusive or harmful, I want to try to welcome everyone in and be around as many people as I can with all kinds of personalities.  There's something of beauty to learn from everyone.  They don't all need to be your best friend or confidante but every person I have taken time to know has blessed my life.  I love you!"

And I mean it.  I'm not always as good as I would like to be at reaching out to those who are different.  And I do judge others.  It's something I am working on.  Often it really does come from a place of concern--why are they making that choice because it is likely to lead to pain or disappointment or distancing themselves from God?  Sometimes it comes from ignorance and lack of understanding.  Sometimes I'm not sure where it comes from.  But it is something I am working on.  And the older I get, the more I realize that there are truly things to learn from each person.  I want to be a gatherer.  I want to be someone who helps others feel important and needed and loved.  Even if they are different from me or have different viewpoints or we don't see eye to eye.

Lessons Learned:  

Stop judging others.

Love others even when they are hard to love.

We all have weaknesses.